Burned out

Since I’m so stressed out with so much prefectorial paper work, school magazine work and the pressure of my upcoming piano exam and trial exam and BK Oral Quiz, do I have the right to break down and cry? Plus, theres rumours going around about me which are not true but I’m not affected by it much because its not serious yet ( Thank God the other person involved is such an angel! ).

You know what, it feels good to cry and let everything out.

People are disappointed with me because of my performance. Pn. Parimalah is not happy with me and I feel BAD. Because she’s been so gracious and kind to me and doesn’t scold me for making mistakes with the minutes and my “discipline record” plus, she hushed up my “breaking-the-major-school-rule” issue when I thought I was gonna get into serious trouble for my stupid, stupid mistake which not only will cause me trouble and shame but to my sister cause I had to drag her down with me.

I’m such a worthless pig.

Then I have to complete my tons and tons of Ed board work and I don’t want to let Pn. Inthirani and Weijean down cause of my major workload and tons of editing. I’ve got my piano exam coming in two weeks and high chances I’ll fail after being assessed by my former piano teacher because I found out that what I’ve learnt from my current piano teacher was all wrong!!!!! So my former piano told me to practice for TWO HOURS A DAY!!!!!!

And I stay back everyday after school for activities and have tuition after that. Where do I have time to fit in TWO HOURS????????????????

Arggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then theres my STUDIES. My studies have screeched to a halt because of my work load and piano exam preparation.
I am such an ungrateful, bad attitude, spiteful teenager who is so lazy and heartless.
I hate myself sometimes.